Year's End 2015

Another year is over...just like that 365 days have passed and before I rush to welcome in the new year, I wan to take a moment to highlight the last one.

I said at the end of last year that I was excited yet uneasy about what God would do with the new year. He did so much in and through me in 2014 and I was sure we would continue the work if I stayed open to Him. Whew! I had no idea!

2015 brought more growth and challenges and clarity and trials and success and character. We took a second major vacation, took major steps with our finances and legacy planning, moved family members and assisted family members, shared new experiences and faced new challenges together. I grew, my marriage grew, our family grew...painful as it was...I am once again overwhelmed by God's love and grace. Why He chose a vessel like me I may never understand, but I am grateful daily for the opportunity to be His hands, feet and voice!

I may not have checked everything off my to-do list, but 2015 was a success and I stand bolder and stronger awaiting what 2016 holds!

Clarity Filters

I teach, or rather facilitate some classes at a local non-profit on our journey with ourselves, God and others. One of the biggest pieces we work on is the lens or filter through which we view things. In the beginning we see things so clearly because life is uncomplicated and simple. As we grow, we develop these lenses and filters as ways of coping with what doesn't make sense or hurts us or contradicts what we thought we knew. As adults, we react through these filters as automatic defenses regardless of reality because it is what we know.

There is great challenge in confronting these lenses and filters and great courage required in changing them. But the freedom that comes from letting go of our skewed reality (I'm fat. I can't do anything right. I'll never learn that because I'm stupid.) into the truth (I'm beautiful and precious. I am unique and I don't have to do everything perfectly. I am capable and can try.) releases us to love ourselves and others better, more deeply. It also releases us to do things and accomplish things we never thought possible. Self-esteem improves, relationships improve (although sometimes the process ends unhealthy ones where the other person isn't open to this change) and futures change as dreams come into focus. It is a truly humbling experience to walk through with someone else.

Now if only we can change the original process for our children, so they grow up with allies that confront truth with them and develop lenses and filters as God sees them. Can you imagine?

Snow Baby

I need to share an experience from this week, but protecting those involved means I will be fairly vague. I received a phone call that a girlfriend of mine might be in labor, but she wasn't sure, what should they do? Given what she was experiencing and the fact that she wasn't quite 36 weeks yet, I advised we go to the hospital now. Of course, this was yesterday, Monday, in the middle of a major snow storm and her husband was already at work, nearly an hour away. This is the first really cool piece. Ben was working from home because of the roads, so he could stay with the kids and I had use of the suv. Awesome!

I picked her up and drove as fast as I felt I safely could into town, praying the whole way, God just keep us straight and true! During the forty minute drive, I confirmed she was actually in labor as contractions were coming closer and stronger and had her call the hospital in between contractions to get them ready for our arrival. I got her into an exam room, parked the car and get her older child settled as I confirmed hubby was almost here. Contractions coming now at two minutes, holding her hand, helping her breath and answer the nurses questions. Hubby walked in to the news that baby is coming and fast as I escorted the sibling out. Here comes really cool piece number two. Baby arrived less than five minutes later. Daddy was there to see his little one born! Super Awesome!

I am still processing and recovering myself, as I have been trying to help them process and recover and care for sibling and deal with all that a preemie brings...I am still pretty numb. But so blessed that I was able to be a part of this miracle and the blessing of this new little one. Thank you Lord for watching over all of us and blessing this world with such a precious snow baby! They have a long road ahead of them, but I know this family is being held by God and supported by some pretty cool people.

 

 

Are we there yet?

As most of you know, Ben and I have read Dave Ramsey's books and follow his pod casts and Facebook page. We agree with a lot of his ground work and ideas and have taken them and worked them into our own plan. We have worked through the first few steps and are now working on building up our retirement and future fund for the children. We are not going to force college on any of them, but would love to help with community college, job training, etc...

I kept thinking with each step I should feel something different. I don't know exactly what I expected, but kind of like a grown up "are we there yet?" with finances. We will always have a budget. We will always have every penny spoken for before the paycheck arrives. We will always be investing and saving and postponing gratification. But isn't there a time when the struggle changes? Where the daily battle is different and the crisis changes?

Well, I feel like we reached that point this past week. The well had been acting up for about a week and we thought we could baby it through the holidays and deal with it next year. But on Christmas Eve, it had other plans. We called a plumber, who was able to come look at it right away and get us on his schedule for this week. Then he gave us the estimate. Ouch! We both took a breath, looked at each other and it hit us. We can pay for that. We paid for Christmas with cash, we have our vacation money set aside and our emergency fund is fine. We have the savings to cover this. Nothing has to be cancelled or taken back or postponed...the only thing this will effect is the amount of money we have already saved for the next crisis. Maybe this really does work!

Maybe all this penny pinching and saving and driving old vehicles and eating in and using cheap phones and not having satellite, maybe it is all worth it when the crisis happens...and I realize it isn't a crisis. Are we there yet? Well, I still don't know what I expect that to feel like, but this felt pretty good! Does it mean we won't ever face a crisis we can't cover? No, but it means it will be a much bigger crisis or too many too close together to get us there. We may not be "there" yet, but this was a really cool experience to share together, to share with the children and to encourage us to keep it up!

 

 

 

 

 

Babies

It seems every year there are new causes to jump in on, new groups to defend, new life to protect. This year was certainly no different. However, the one that struck me most was actually a new version of an old struggle. Before you get all political with me here, I will be brief and simply share my opinion on my blog.

Life. When does it begin. When does it need to be defended. When does it need to be protected. Those who support abortion, are not likely to change their minds based off anything I say or do. But this year we as a country, a society, were given clarity on life and whether it changed our view point, we can no longer say we did not know.

"You may chose to look the other way, but you can never again say that you did not know." - William Wilberforce

Mr Wilberforce was speaking to the slave trade and our (as a country and human beings) treatment of people who looked different than us. But I would argue this quote could just as easily be said for our (as a country and human beings) treatment of the unborn. We have seen the videos. The evidence is clear. These are babies, with heartbeats and brains and fingers and toes. We may chose to look the other way and continue to allow their deaths, but we can never again say that we did not know we were murdering children. Let's be honest and truthful and call it what it is. We are murdering babies.

I don't believe abortion will ever be illegal again in this country, at least not in my lifetime. But can you imagine a country where we so valued life that even our littlest and most defenseless were protected? Where every woman was supported through pregnancy and every baby was given a chance? Wouldn't that be beautiful? Are we willing to take the steps necessary to see that? I believe the first step is to speak the truth...so here is my first step.

Vaca Part 11 & Final: Arlington National Cemetery

Our last day was reserved for the cemetery. I thought this would be a great slow day with an hour at the cemetery, a half hour at the Pentagon memorial and a couple hours at the Natural History museum (trip two). I had not expected to see so much and experience so much and have Ben and the kids taking in so much. It truly is more than just a cemetery. It is where President Kennedy and his wife are buried, along with their infant daughter (I didn't know they had lost an infant) and young son.

It is where about 400,000 service men and women are buried along with some of their spouses and children...this number is the number of military lives our country lost during WWII. Let that sink in a moment. Everyone of these graves would have been needed just for that one war!

It is where the Tomb of the Unknown Soldier is located. Guarded with honor and respect for the sacrifice made by so many. We were able to witness a changing of the guards, which was executed with precision, of course.

It is where the Arlington House is. It is also just a beautiful cemetery with trees and paths and benches and wildlife and rows and rows of white tombstones with names engraved and so much loss, but so much legacy!

The experience took us more than three hours (remember, I planned on one) and still we could have stayed longer. Every piece of this trip was so wonderful, from the weather to health, housing to the vehicle, experiences to memories being made. I love that we made this a priority, that we made this happen for our family, that we experienced it together, that we are all looking forward to next year's trip!

Thank you for reading along as I shared this journey...

Vaca Part 10: Arlington House

I truly did not know there was a House at Arlington, but it was a highlight of our trip. It is a long walk up and around the cemetery to get there, but the view is amazing! It is a great location for a house and a better location for a military vantage point, so it is no surprise the Union Army took the house during the Civil War. What was surprising was that the lady of the house, Mrs Mary Lee, was not only the wife of General Lee (a general in the Confederate Army) but she was also the step-grand-daughter of General Washington!

Mary and Robert were married in the parlor, which like the rest of the house was set with period pieces, some of which were original to the house. They had seven children, the first being born at the hospital and the other six born in the house reportedly because Mary had a poor experience at the hospital. She scheduled their travels so she would be home to deliver in a small drawing room on the second floor.

During the tour, some of us were able to go to the attic where you can still see names and scratchings in the trusses made by the Union Army during the war.

It impressed me how Mary must have struggled to balance her love and devotion to her husband and her family, while on opposite sides of the war. She must have been very strong and courageous, too, because she had a special room in the house where she taught the slaves to read and included the slave children in Sunday School lessons with her own children. At the time it was illegal to teach slaves, but she did anyway, reportedly because she believed they would one day be free and she wanted them to have the skills necessary to succeed.

Last piece:  Arlington National Cemetery

Merry Christmas!

We have a lot of family near by, so holidays are always bustling with family, food and fun. Christmas is no different. Christmas Eve we had sixteen of us for dinner, stockings and a gift exchange. I really wish I could capture the smell of roasting turkey and stuffing, bubbling gravy and fresh baked rolls and pies...my favorite. meal. ever!

Christmas day will be a bit different, with our quiet family traditions in the morning (each child receives one gift from mom and dad and one gift from a sibling gift exchange) and then soups, sandwiches and leftovers for lunch and dinner with family coming and going as their schedules allow.

Whatever your holiday holds, may you be reminded of the greatest gift ever given...the gift of Jesus!

Merry Christmas from our family to yours!

Vaca Part 9: Air & Space Museum

https://www.blogger.com/blogger.g?blogID=6126534660640333112#editor/target=post;postID=3513852908985370588;onPublishedMenu=posts;onClosedMenu=posts;postNum=12;src=postnameHelicopters and Airplanes and Spaceships, oh my! I knew the Air and Space museum would be enjoyed, but I had no idea how much the kiddos would love seeing all the different kinds of aircraft and learning about flight. We started at the smaller museum on the National Mall where we learned about the Write brothers and jet engines, experienced an IMax movie on space travel and a hands on learning center.

The kids enjoyed it so much, we took them out to Dulles a few days later for a look at more aircraft, a simulator experience and an inspiring look at the space shuttle Discovery. To think of the process of developing the ideas, putting them into play, building such a machine and actually flying it into space, not once or twice, but 39 times! You could see the scorch marks from the heat of re-entry and the panels that were replaced at various times for repair.

We spent most of our time with Discovery, but also self-toured the rest of the enormous building full of aircraft...some hanging from the ceiling. This was one of the favorites as the kids decided it was just their size.

Another shot of Discovery from the catwalk with the kids being...well, themselves.

We ate our picnic lunch in the grass by the vehicle and then went back in for some more adventures. We started with a tour of the observation deck which has views of Dulles International Airport and many of the take off and landing patterns. We watched large jets fly in and take off for quite a while before the children decided to move on. It was really fun to experience with them. Before leaving the deck, though, the kids made sure to take a photo of our suv in the parking lot. Can you see it?

Our two middle children took me up on the offer to try out a flight simulator. Neither one loved it, but I was pleased they had tried something new. If the lines had not been so long, mommy would have gone too! On the way out, we took a closer look at this fountain and the names inscribed on the plaques. These are in honor of those who support flight training, education and advancements. And we got one more shot of a jet flying overhead in to land at Dulles.

Next: Arlington House (I didn't even know there was one!)