Waiting

A while back I had the privilege of hearing the heart of a girlfriend of mine. Sharing her fears, concerns, hopes as she walks a challenging road. My humanness wants to push back with "I know" "I understand" "you have NO idea what I have been through", but I bit my tongue, or maybe, God held my tongue! No, she doesn't know the cross I have had to carry, but in truth, I don't know her's either! What I do know, is that both of us are walking this road in faith, trusting that the God who created us, who put us here, is leading us. I also know how lonely that road can be and how much it helps to have someone who will listen, care and pray for me!

My father-in-law, Ed, shares a scene from an Indiana Jones movie (I apologize, he is a much better story teller than I). The one where Indiana has come to a ledge, what looks like a dead end, but the clues tell him he has to cross the chasm. Then we see it...there is a way across, but it has been camouflaged to look like the chasm. Indiana has to step out and trust what he can't see.

How many times has God asked me to step out and trust Him when I couldn't see. Or worse, have I turned and gone back, giving up the mission because I didn't trust what I couldn't see.

On the way home, this song came on the radio. It has been a favorite but seemed to say what I had been struggling to put into words.

I will move ahead, bold and confident
Taking every step in obedience
While I'm waiting
I will serve You
While I'm waiting
I will worship
While I'm waiting
I will not faint
I'll be running the race
Even while I wait *

Whatever my cross to bear, whatever my path to walk, whatever the story God is telling with my life, I can trust Him. He is trustworthy. He is compassionate. He is honorable. He is loving and faithful, just and patient, gentle and strong. He is everything I need. He has not abandoned me or dumped me in the middle of what appears to me to be a mess!

I may not be able to hear Him today. I may not be able to see what He can see. But I can trust Him. So I wait. And my girlfriend waits. I will continue to put God first. I will continue to take that next step. Because He is one who is worthy and I trust He is leading me.

I can be bold. I can be confident. Because He knows me. Because He knows exactly the cross He has given me. Because He understands exactly how I feel. I will persevere, because He hasn't given up on me (and Lord knows, I have given Him many reasons to do so).

I may feel like I'm in a holding pattern, but I believe I'm here for a reason.


*John Waller "While I'm Waiting"